When I was in my early 20s I forgave a girlfriend that cheated on me, and it was an amazing relief. I haven't had that ability since! I know I'm growing wiser, but if I could turn invisible or teleport, a couple of people would experience several moments of discomfort. Apologies for being so blunt, but at this point I feel certain that "evening the score" would be soothing to me. I think you're doing the right thing by trying to find ways to resolve your pain by learning to forgive those people Flutter, but I completely understand how challenging that can be.